Second Time’s the Charm?

Second TIme's The Charm?
Image via Flickr/Col Ford and Natasha de Vere

This article originally appeared on Mom.com on February 23, 2015. Read the original article here.

I feel like this is the calm before the storm. This is the last week before the start of my cycle and everything goes to hell. I’ve spent the past month after choosing my egg donor just sitting around. Waiting. I hate waiting.

Whenever Chris and I go on a big trip, I am a total freak in the weeks leading up to it. I just want to go already! I pack as much as humanly possible in advance. I scour the Internet for places to go, even though my husband has already planned out the trip to a T. I spend the weeks restless, antsy, and the night before we are to leave, I can’t sleep in anticipation.

So why should traveling to Texas again to get pregnant be any different?

I want to book the hotels. I want to pay for the plane tickets. I want to tell my friend and sister in Texas exactly when we are coming. But we have to wait, because it all comes down to when I get my period and when it comes, it leaves no rest for the weary. The day it comes, I am on the phone with both my local and the Texas clinics, coordinating doctor’s orders, scheduling ultrasounds; my medications need to be prescribed and sent to a local specialty pharmacy. The flight and hotels need to be booked and we need to figure out the schedule for our dog and who is caring for him while we are away.

It makes me crabby. Very crabby. I cry. A lot. Chris and I will inevitably fight about multiple aspects of the upcoming trip. I will be stressed out with making sure all the coordination is done appropriately and there is no miscommunication. Miscommunication does not fare well when the timing of everything is down to the hour. It especially doesn’t fare well for an infertile woman.

The only thing that I have on my side that is different from the last trip is that I am now working casually from home and won’t have the stress of trying to get time off. In my job, someone needs to cover my work and when I was last gone for almost two weeks, it made it very stressful right before the trip, to the point that I became sick with a head cold right before our flight, which in turn just added to the overwhelming feelings I was having, thinking I may be too sick for an embryo transfer.

This time around, I can focus solely on the trip and the transfer without having the added stress of work, of which I am entirely thankful for.

Getting pregnant in another state is not for the faint of heart. I’ve started going back to the gym because exercise, including yoga, has helped me in the past with stress management.

Right now, I seriously need some of that.

14 Comments

  1. February 26, 2015 / 1:20 pm

    I am choosing to have hope for you.

  2. February 26, 2015 / 2:14 pm

    Just FYI, I've tried to read a couple posts on your new blog that you link to, and it only partially loads on my phone. Not sure if it's just me, but thought I'd let you know in case anyone else is having issues, too. I haven't been able to read any of your posts :-/

  3. February 26, 2015 / 2:45 pm

    Hi Adi, thanks for letting me know. Is it the mom.me site that won't load the whole article? I know on blogher they have issues with their mobile site where I always have to "request desktop site" from the menu on my phone.

  4. February 26, 2015 / 2:46 pm

    Thank you Caroline! Almost here!

  5. February 26, 2015 / 2:46 pm

    🙂 Thanks, Toni!

  6. February 26, 2015 / 5:36 pm

    You're so right, traveling for IVF is hard… crazy what lengths we have to go to for less expensive cycles, huh? Hoping that everything goes as smoothly as possible with the setup for your cycle! I'm excited for you, Risa!

  7. February 26, 2015 / 5:53 pm

    Hope everything turns out good.

  8. February 26, 2015 / 7:20 pm

    Ahhh! I will be thinking of you!! XO

  9. February 26, 2015 / 9:20 pm

    IVF is hard. Traveling to do I IVF is a whole other beast. My hope is that with this new protocol and you managing stress that this time goes smoother. And fingers are crossed for some very good news soon.

  10. February 27, 2015 / 3:35 pm

    I did donor eggs too. I'm wishing you all the best.

  11. February 28, 2015 / 5:49 pm

    I can never sleep before a trip either. You have all the more reason to be a mess leading up to it because so much is on the line. I am praying so hard for you that this is the lucky time it's going to work!

  12. March 4, 2015 / 3:06 pm

    IVF alone is hard so I can only imagine that adding traveling into all of the timing would be a recipe for stress 🙁 I am very hopeful for you and wish you the very best at getting your babies here in Texas!

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