Time is going by so quick. Last night I was checking my email and was reminded of June’s ICLW.
Already??
A little introduction. My husband and I have been married for almost five years and trying to get pregnant for four. We went through nine cycles of TI and Clomid before moving on to see a fertility specialist.
We then did three consecutive IUI cycles. Everything looked great every time. I was responding to the meds, sperm counts spectacular. No baby. Nada. Zilch. The only thing that was a little abnormal was my low estrogen levels. Our doctor conferenced with us at the end of April and it was decided we would move on to IVF.
It’s amazing what you once thought to be terrifying really starts becoming your everyday life. The injections, while I still dislike them, are a part of my routine. Our first lab visit on Tuesday told us my estrogen levels were (again) lower than normal. Our first ultrasound Thursday on Day 5 of stims showed two larger follicles, one on each side, but they don’t start measuring them until they are 11 mm or larger. Totally normal, the nurse reassured. I was hoping for more follicles though.
The side effects sure tell a different story. Two nights ago, I had a bad day at work and came home crying. Then I was fine until I was sitting downstairs with Chris talking about something or another, and whatever it was made me burst into tears. So I cried, a lot. Chris hugged me and told me it was just my added hormones and that he loved me. Which in turn made me cry harder, which prompted a visit to Dairy Queen for a S’mores Blizzard. I was in a better mood after that.
I am now starting to have some serious acne. I mean, the BCPs did a number on my chest, but now the acne is coming to my face. I still get the Lupron headaches, the ones that come suddenly like a dagger and go away after a few seconds. I’m getting bloated. My stomach looks like a pincushion.
I have no sex-drive. None. What.so.evah. And I don’t care. I have no desire to have sex with him. Of course now, when people see us, they are either going to look awkwardly at me or sympathetically at Chris. Which totally bites because we are ordered to stop sex in just a few days and we aren’t supposed to do any dancing for almost a month. Risa, a month ago would have whined and pranced around in lingerie. Risa, now, says, “meh.” Who cares? Not this girl. Besides, how sexy can I be right now?
Chris: “You’re so hot. I want you.”
Me: “Ok I guess, but be careful of my stomach, it still hurts from the shot.”
Chris: “I can’t wait to get you naked.”
Me: “Uh-huh. Hey, do you think Pizza Hut delivers this late?”
Chris: “What?”
Me: “Never mind. Use some lubricant this time. The hormones make me too dry.”
Chris: “Ok, anything you say. You are such a good kisser.”
Me: “Ow! You’re on my ovary! Get off me!”
Tomorrow morning we go in for another ultrasound and hopefully see some more growth.
What about you? Where is everybody at this month?
I feel your pain! I start lupron for tomorrow for ivf #3.
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I just want to clarify that I was not on her ovary.
2ww after 2nd IUI attempt. I feel the same way about sex but its not because of drugs…
Best of luck to you my dear!
Ooo nice! Lupron. Ugh. But I guess it has its purpose.
You crack me up! I love how candid you are! As you know, we are enjoying summer and NOT doing IVF. Praying for you guys and all those doing it, but right now, I can't see ever being able to physically or mentally handle it again. Tired of heartbreak and failure. Thinking adoption is in our future, but since I just started a new job in May, we'll give it a few months. Hope you have some awesome follies tomorrow!
I guess we'll see! Lupron is new this time. I'm so excited for new side effects!
Just got our first negative BETA and waiting for AF to show up so we can begin Round #2. Also gearing up for the next round with insurance…oy….
Dude…so true. My hubby went on a 3 week work trip and I was oh so relieved because I wouldn't have to keep feeling bad about the lack of sex drive. Lupron, you're such a bitch.
Thinking good, follicle-growing thoughts for you!
Ha ha ha. Thanks for the clarification.
Ugh I know what you mean TI just drains me of my sex drive. We are about to enter our first clomid cycle. FX for everyone
i hope theres growth come tuesday!
Cracking up at the dialog…I know it too well! Fingers crossed for lots more follicles next week! I bet you'll have quite a few pop up!
2ww after FET#2…my RE says to abstain entirely during the 2ww after a transfer (?) Hope you have lots of big happy follicles growing!
Megan I hope you enjoy the Lupron as much as I have 🙂
Ever since I read "s'mores blizzard", I can't think of anything else! Yummmm!
Yay for growing follicles!!
I had the same feelings when I was growing the eggs. Sex just wasn't on my agenda.
At one point my Doc told my husband that he'd have to take care of things on his own because I was too bloated. Sexy, right?
I shouldn't be laughing but yeah, I so know the feeling!
Hope your follicles grow grow grow:) We have IUI #3 on Monday. Praying this is our cycle – saying a prayer for you guys too. Thanks for helping to keep us laughing!
Hah! My sex drive is also done like dinner. As in, if it never happened again, I don't think I'd care. Glad to know it's not just me.
Jenni, I hope you take all the time you need. I am hoping this cycle is successful, but if it's not.. I don't know.
Ugh I'm sorry to hear that. I hope this next cycle is successful for you, Amanda!
Ha! Yep! It's kind of a weird feeling, but I hope this Lupron crap goes away. Thanks Emily!
Ah Clomid! Hope it works! I know of quite a few who took Clomid and got pregnant so I am hoping this works for you!
Thanks, Sarah! Things are still looking good!
Ha ha right?? I have three more that came today so hoping they keep on a'growin'!
Yep, I have to do that too. Yikes.
Fingers tightly crossed for you that you get a BFP!!
Mmm I know. It was SO good!
Ha! Love it! I know, I am so bloated, it makes things a little… challenging 🙂
Right?? 🙂
Definitely keeping you in my thoughts, Kasey!
Ha ha! Yeah I seriously hope I get it back. I mean, what else would I have to fill my time with?
I am praying that this is your cycle. Thank you for making me crave a Smores Blizzard though. I literally gasped and said Smores Blizzard out loud while reading your post, which led to my husband saying, "What?" Thankfully he has learned that I am not as crazy as I sound.
I look forward to following your blog…here from ICLW!
This made me snort laugh! S'mores Blizzards are AMAZING!
Ugh…the Lupron side effects are awful…I guess you got the raw deal.
Take Care and good luck!
#17
Hi from ICLW…the stims are a bitch!!!!!!!!
hahahah!
That dialog recap was hilarious. And it seems like Chris handles it really well. Hope it all gets better for you soon and that this is all worth it and you get that BFP!! xoxo
Thanks for your comment on my post and happy ICLW. This made me laugh and so did the clarification – sounds like you have a good guy 😉
This was hilarious and probably the words spoken between husband & wives way to often if they've been ttc for so many years. Best of luck tomorrow!!
Too funny. I love you guys!