In Which I Call Myself Fat

Guess what guys?  I’m fat.  I can blame it on the Clomid, or the progesterone, or the stress of infertility, or sitting on the couch watching WAY too many episodes of Honey Boo Boo Grey’s Anatomy, eating ice cream sandwiches carrot sticks and celery.  But the fact is, I’ve gotten a little too rotund around the midsection.  I haven’t been to the gym in months.  My stomach looks like I’ve been excessively hitting the keg stands and then running out to Taco Bell for a burrito afterward.

In Which I Call Myself Fat

I am 167 pounds.  I figure I talk so freely about my lady business, what’s a little talk about how fat Risa is?  I need to lose weight.  I need to eat better.  I am a nurse.  I know exactly how to be healthy. But when I am on hormones and depressed and limited to low-impact exercises several days a month so I don’t twist one of my big-ass Clomid-induced ovaries, sending me to the hospital to surgery, and making me more infertile and pathetic than I already am, it’s really hard to think about working out and talk about a run-on sentence (GAWDputaperiodintherebitch!).

So… I’m going to lose weight.  And I am making it embarrassingly public so everyone can hold me to it and call me the fat kid or something if they see my lumpy ass in real life.

Plus, it can’t hurt from a fertility stand point, right?  See how I did that? Bring in something unrelated like Taco Bell and my fatness and then relate it to fertility.  Genius.

Good night, friends.

10 Comments

  1. February 10, 2013 / 9:03 am

    I hear ya! I am in a very similar situation. I've gained at least 10 pounds since starting fertility treatment (and I was at least 10 pounds too heavy in the first place). I haven't been able to pinpoint it on any one thing, but a lot like you, I imagine it's the drugs, stress, feeling limited to low-impact workouts, the holiday season, and emotions. This whole process is so dang hard.

    So I'm with you, lady. I need to shed these extra pounds, and it's always helpful to have a cheering section or at least others that can relate. Wishing you best of luck!

  2. February 10, 2013 / 9:40 am

    Ugh- I would love to be 167! Instead, I am 5'6 and…. 197! BOOO!!!
    I effin hate (and love) fertility drugs! But, girl, you are a beauty no matter what. I really beleive that! On a side note; is it horrible that I have no idea who Honey Boo Boo is?!!

  3. February 10, 2013 / 10:25 am

    That's where I'm at. I weigh 165, and for the last three years battling depression, infertility and miscarriages, I gain about 10 lbs a year.

  4. February 10, 2013 / 11:34 am

    Good luck! It's so hard dealing with IF (and everything that goes with it). all I want is comfort food. I want mac 'n cheese and pizza and lots of dessert. But then I force myself to eat something healthy instead. Well, not always but more often now than I used to. I'll be cheering you on!

  5. February 10, 2013 / 11:49 am

    I think it's a good goal. Fertility drugs and treatments take such a toll on one's body. Add in the effects from depression and grief from this process, and it's hard to prevent it. Still, I commend you for taking charge. Post a plan and we'll cheer you on!

  6. February 10, 2013 / 12:57 pm

    thanks for addressing this issue. I've terrified that I'll gain most of my pregnancy weight allowance just trying to get pregnant. It's just ONE MORE THING that SUCKS about infertility!

  7. February 10, 2013 / 3:11 pm

    I totally hear you. I gained a bunch of weight my first time around with fertility treatments, then lost a bunch of weight, and now it's piling back on. So frustrating. I'm joining the gym tomorrow. Seriously, I am.

  8. February 11, 2013 / 6:15 pm

    You're being too hard on yourself, you're gorgeous! I know it's in all of our nature to do everything humanly possible to increase our chances, and you're definitely right that this is one thing that will definitely help, but don't torture yourself!

  9. February 11, 2013 / 7:15 pm

    I'm right there with you sister! Although, my excuse is not the meds, but just emotional eating for the past two weeks straight with nothing but junk food following my miscarriage. Ugg. Time to get back on track.

    I also want to say you aren't FAT! You might have a little extra pudge around the middle than you would like, but I agree with Jamie, you are gorgeous, which we can plainly see in your picture 🙂

  10. February 11, 2013 / 9:18 pm

    Ha! Well I should probably mention I am 5' 4" so I think technically I am almost in the obese category. Sigh. And no, it's ok if you don't know who Honey Boo Boo is. It's probably better that way.

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