I can check IUIs off the infertile to-do list

It’s that time again!  In which I tell the world that I am trying to create life with nothing but a catheter, some sperm, and a nurse with steady hands.  We had a great count with the first IUI yesterday: 145 million after the wash and 86% motility.  My husband is so hot.

I know I have no pictures.  I know right, what a horrible, private snoot.  Truth is, it wasn’t very fun.  I don’t take pictures well while I am writhing on the table. I even had my bladder bulgy so that it would make the catheter easier to maneuver.  Poo on that.  It didn’t make a difference.  It hurt.  ZOMG! It hurt!

Nurse: “Ok now, just relax (while I shove this pointy, jagged knife up you).”

Me: “Ow…”

Nurse: “Stop rolling into the fetal position.”

Me: “I don’t think it’s hurt this bad before.”

Nurse: “Deep breaths. (This jagged pointy thing isn’t going in right. I am just going to push a little harder and twist it around a little bit.)”

Me: Breaking Chris’s hand.

Nurse: “Almost done!”

Another successful IUI.

Every time I have this, I have to lay on the table for ten minutes afterward. Every time the nurse forgets to put the sheet back down over my legs. By all means, I love leaving my lady bits exposed. Having Chris be the one to actually cover me up himself (after the nurse has already left and it’s just the two of us in the room) seems a little backward thinking, but what are you going to do? Anyway, those ten minutes were painful.  I don’t know what it was about this time, but I had these sharp shooting crampy pinchy pains the whole time. Ugh. I hate doing these.

The nurse told me she was optimistic about this cycle. Good, because I’m glad someone is.  She said I had great follicles and a great count.

I made it through the rest of my day and spent the rest of the evening on the couch with this:

I can check IUIs off the Infertile To-Do List

 

Chris got home from class and said, because of his frustrating day at work that he is going to have a beer.  He offered me a wine cooler.  “Maybe it’ll be the secret sauce?” he says.

You know what?  I did.  I had a wine cooler.  It was great.  Maybe this cycle I can get pregnant from a night of drinking like everyone else, GAWD!

Today’s IUI went better than the first.  What are our numbers?  Ready for this one?

242 million.  ***CORRECTION: 282 million***

That’s a lot of sperm.

They are dying off by the millions as I write this, but I am going to be positive this cycle.  It only takes one.  I am feeling strangely optimistic.  We had a great cycle.  Above all else, we had a fighting chance this month.  No canceled IUIs, three great follicles, great sperm count (Chris is especially giddy over this one).  There is no reason why this shouldn’t work this cycle, right?

**** CORRECTION***
Chris wanted to put it out there that the count was actually 282 million, not 242 million.

37 Comments

  1. March 13, 2013 / 7:14 pm

    No reason at all! But just in case, I think you should have another wine cooler. 🙂

  2. March 13, 2013 / 7:22 pm

    It just doesn't seem possible that just one of those hundreds of million sperm doesn't hit the target. Wishing you the best of luck this cycle. and maybe that wine cooler really will be the missing ingredient 🙂

  3. March 13, 2013 / 7:32 pm

    I just saw a patient who succeeded with get third IUI, so hoping third time is the charm for you! BTW, thanks for your description of the post IUI wait…I have been wondering about keeping the lady bits exposed…

  4. March 13, 2013 / 7:55 pm

    Dang! those are great numbers, Chris. Way. To. Go!

    Come on Risa, get this BFP for both of us!!

  5. March 13, 2013 / 7:57 pm

    Ha ha! Maybe… it's tempting.. 🙂

  6. March 13, 2013 / 7:58 pm

    Thanks, Jen. I know, I don't get why NONE of them get into my eggie. So frustrating.

  7. March 13, 2013 / 8:00 pm

    Yay! Thanks for the encouragement my dear 🙂 I have heard the "third time IUI success" too so hopefully it works!

  8. March 13, 2013 / 8:02 pm

    I know, right?? Don't encourage him. His head is big enough.
    BFP for me and a BFP for you for your next cycle. Something's gotta give right?

  9. March 13, 2013 / 8:50 pm

    Good Luck, Risa! Hope this is the one! My GYN kept saying "a little pressure" and "sorry" and "almost done" during my pap today. I told him that I was fine cause that's really nothing compared to all I've been through. Really I didn't feel a thing, but he nicely said, "well, I understand but we don't want to add insult to injury." Sorry it hurt this time but hoping this is the one for you guys!

  10. March 13, 2013 / 8:59 pm

    good grief! what were the pre-wash numbers? that's insane! how awesome! hoping at least a few million can make the tiny little swim (they're half way there, right?)! good luck!

  11. March 13, 2013 / 9:40 pm

    Right! BFP! BFP! BFP! (That was me chanting, by the way)

  12. March 13, 2013 / 10:02 pm

    I love how you don't sugar coat the facts. My IUI was painful, BFN. Hoping you have a sticky, BFP cycle 🙂

  13. Anonymous
    March 13, 2013 / 11:26 pm

    Hearing all that makes me cringe.OUCH! Hey you are a total trooper. All the comments look good from the nurses so I'm crossing my fingers on this one! Love you both
    -littlest sister

  14. March 14, 2013 / 12:18 am

    Way to go, Chris!!! Those are amazing numbers. Regarding the wine cooler: a little alcohol will have zero effect on any developing embryo. After all, if it did, alcohol would be considered a form of birth control.

    Hoping this cycle is the one!!

  15. March 14, 2013 / 7:45 am

    Woohoo (minus the pain and discomfort)! I think that wine cooler will be just the thing that does the trick. Looking forward to some happy news in two short weeks.

  16. March 14, 2013 / 11:00 am

    Good luck!!

  17. March 14, 2013 / 11:17 am

    "Maybe this cycle I can get pregnant from a night of drinking like everyone else, GAWD!" HAHahahaha! Awesome. And that is a ridiculous amount of sperm! Fingers crossed real hard for you that this worked!

  18. March 14, 2013 / 11:27 am

    Damn! That's a lot of sperm! One of those little guys has got to fertilize at least one of those eggs. I just don't see how it CAN'T happen.

    P.S. I always had a terrible time with the catheter, too. I do not miss those days at all!

  19. March 14, 2013 / 11:43 am

    FWIW – My RE told me it's more uncomfortable if your bladder is full.

    High five on the high counts.

  20. March 14, 2013 / 2:24 pm

    I have a good feeling about this cycle. That is a CRAZY amount of sperm and with three eggs acting like little homing beacons, I'm thinking – how can this not work!?!? Also, I didn't know that they sometimes did two separate IUIs. Interesting. I wonder why they wouldn't do that for everybody. And I wonder why they chose to do it for you since the sperm count is so high?

  21. March 14, 2013 / 8:32 pm

    By the time I go back for my PAP I am going to be an old pro laying on the table saying, "Ah this is nothing!" 🙂

  22. March 14, 2013 / 8:33 pm

    I know! I even asked the nurse if that was pre-wash, and she said no, that it was after the "clean-up." Gah! I just hope one makes it.

  23. March 14, 2013 / 8:34 pm

    Yay! I was chanting in my head reading this. Thanks! 🙂

  24. March 14, 2013 / 8:35 pm

    Oh it's just the worst when you go through so much physical pain, only to have to go through emotional pain afterward. Sorry to hear about your BFN 🙁

  25. March 14, 2013 / 8:36 pm

    Ha ha I know, right? OUCH is right. Thanks little sis 🙂

  26. March 14, 2013 / 8:36 pm

    Cristy, this is excellent logic. Couldn't have said it better myself. 🙂

  27. March 14, 2013 / 8:37 pm

    I am hoping so. Maybe the wine cooler will loosen up any uptight sperm so they get bold and haul ass toward the egg.

  28. March 15, 2013 / 10:09 am

    Hoping this cycle is it for you! I am going in for my 5th IUI today…and hoping it doesn't hurt like hell like the last one. Thanks for the laughs to start my morning off right. Oh, and kudos to your hubby for all those sperm lol

  29. March 15, 2013 / 10:31 am

    Way to go Chris! Those are amazing numbers 🙂 I will be sending baby dust your way !

  30. March 16, 2013 / 6:58 pm

    Thanks Janet!

  31. March 16, 2013 / 6:59 pm

    It IS a ridiculous amount of sperm. I hope ONE of them can at least find the egg 🙂

  32. March 16, 2013 / 6:59 pm

    I don't know if it has to do with how my cervix lies, but ugh, ow.

  33. March 16, 2013 / 7:02 pm

    I know. They say it's more difficult to get the catheter in with an empty bladder, but when it's full it HURTS!

  34. March 16, 2013 / 7:03 pm

    I have no idea. I don't know if it's doctor-specific or what, but that was the plan from the beginning and I never thought it ask. I just assumed it's what CRM did. You must not have.. weird. I'll have to ask about that.

  35. March 16, 2013 / 7:05 pm

    Good luck to you then! Hoping and praying for you!

  36. March 16, 2013 / 7:05 pm

    Ha ha thanks! And Chris says thanks 🙂

  37. March 18, 2013 / 9:28 am

    Good luck to you!! It sounds so very hopeful 🙂

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